Supper was family time. We didn’t designate it as quality time, although that would be a good definition. It was just when the four of us spent time together, talked about the important things that happened that day, checked up on how school was going, and discussed any plans and chores coming up for the rest of the week. No topic was off limits. The boys were allowed to ask anything they wanted and I promised a fair discussion and an honest answer. Topics ranged anywhere from fishing and hunting to girls to something they had heard in Sunday School. We sat at the table a lot of the times longer than anyone had really intended, but in looking back those were really special days.
The answer to a lot of the problems between parents and kids today may be finding ways to spend quality time with each other. Parents look at their schedules; the kids do the same. The number of people who make up the household is the number of schedules that are involved. No wonder they often throw up their hands in frustration, acknowledging there’s just no way it can happen. Obviously concessions must be made. But who will make them? Usually time together goes out the window while everybody scurries to their next appointment.
I like things simple. Why spend time trying to figure out how to synchronize multiple schedules? Just set one time each day when everyone makes the same commitment–gather around the dinner table. Choose whatever time is the best for the family and declare that time sacred. Nothing other than emergencies is allowed to interfere. I still went to ballgames, band concerts, drama presentations, hosted youth activities, took the boys fishing, chaperoned school trips, and all the other things parents are expected to do. But when dinner was served, that was the time just for the four of us, MaMa, Brian, Chris, and me.
Will it work today? I don’t know; it did in the 80s.
Grams
